"Something stinks here..."
How many times have you asked yourself that only to find
the cause of the odor seemingly unaware of the noxious fumes? It seems to happen
to me all the time, and I find it nearly unbearable. Just today (1/31/01) I went
to the computer lab in Stewart Center to check my e-mail and I had sat down for
no more than 30 seconds when someone's pungent odor drifted my way. The cause of
the odor was this oversized, bearded ogar on the computer next to me. The guy
was a twitchy guy that kept putting his hands behind his head (probably the
source of the odor), and was busy working on some programming problem. I didn't
want to be rude and tell him that deodorant is only a buck or two a stick, so I
sat hopeful that he would leave...and thankfully for the betterment of my air
quality he left about 20 minutes later....I was none the less left traumatized
This type of situation that I'm describing happens far too
common in little old Indiana. What for? I understand body odor, good ol' B.O.
that I get after being in the field for a couple of days doing army stuff. Plus
the smell that these people have is not B.O. its like a moldy smell...the smell
of not cleaning yourself for weeks or months. I know when I stink, I'm not used
to my stench by no means. Nor am I used to anyone else's. People that I have
talked to that have spent long times in the field (months) have always said that
they could barely stand to smell themselves or be close to anyone else. So I
don't assume one gets accustomed to their odor...or do they?
Now, I by no means want to single out any one group of
people, but it seems that some certain people have a problem. Now, every house
or apartment that I have ever been to in the United States has had indoor
plumbing, and with that comes a shower or a tub. Both very nice and easy ways to
clean yourself. A bar of soap is less than a buck...and deodorant is a couple
bucks. This by no means should cause financial difficulties by any means! So
what is keeping peopling from simple acts of personal hygiene? In basic training
we even had a CLASS on personal hygiene...yes it was redundant...but some people
need that...since they obviously don't care to take a 10 minute shower. Now that
I think of it...in my basic training platoon there was a smelly private who got
thrown in the shower one time...no I didn't partake in this...I was busy writing
Speaking of Amanda one time the two of us went to enjoy a
nice quiet movie. We sat down in our seats nice and early before the movie
started and were busy eating popcorn when some people sat down behind us. Well,
these guys reeked so bad it was terrible. They were Purdue students that didn't
go home for Thanksgiving break (use your imagination here), and smelled worse
than a turkey that had been in the sun for days. We were forced to move and we
found another seat. No sooner had we become situated in our new seat someone
else sat down. These guys reeked of nasty tobacco and B.O., and unbelievably
smelled worse than the first. We moved again and FINALLY found some nice, clean,
hygienic people to sit by.
I guess I should emphasize that I'm not totally whacked
out...that a lot of people that I've talked to have felt the exact same way as I
do. We all smell the same thing...and cringe...and even on a couple occasions
had to put our nose in our shirts. One friend of mine told me that while she was
in London over the summer she carried a bottle of Febrez with her to spray the
stinky people in the buses and trains. Is that what we have to do? Carry around
odor hiders in order to make our air bearable to breathe? I'd hope not but it
seems like sometimes we have no choice! What else can we do?
Another solution that might come in handy is a magazine.
When you are presented with a potentially smelly situation you can bury your
head in the magazine and turn to one of those perfume or cologne
advertisements...open that sucker up and breathe nice scented air! Other than
that I don't really have any idea.
If you live in the dorms you could talk to your RA or
counselor about the problem. I remember my freshman year, in the residence hall
handbook there was a section about personal hygiene. Speaking of the dorms and
smells...my brothers dorm hall stinks...I don't think mine smelled freshman year
(no one ever told me nor did I smell anything)...but his stinks. His counselor
needs to find the source of this odor and introduce him to a bar of soap. Ok,
What can we do about this problem? I have no idea...this
is a rant not a solution...
This is meant as a joke and not to be taken seriously, if
Jason has offended you he apologizes, he really is a nice person and just enjoys
nice smells. Thank you.